Perfectly Imperfect

The goal is not to be perfect; the goal is to be accepted for the imperfections.

One Life. Live Passionately!

One Life. Live Passionately!

This one-liner statement seems more like a common sense, than a motto, don’t you think? We know we only have one life, that’s not ground-breaking news – please spare me the afterlife and past lives beliefs, I mean, feel free to believe what you want and I respect that; the fact remains, we will die in this lifetime, and there is no definite telling if we will reincarnate into an ant, a pig, a cute little feline, or as one suffering human.

Taking the basics into consideration, it only makes sense that we live passionately in this lifetime, whatever it may be left for us.

For a few years, the tagline after my business trade name has been ‘creating simply joy’. I guess it fitted me perfectly then. For the longest time, I didn’t believe good things will come my way, ever. I believed that if I were to attempt a small skip, the world of bad may notice, and the only thing I was left with – subtle comfort – may be crushed too.

Of late, I realized that I don’t have to live loud to live passionately. To live passionately, simply means embracing people and things that make you happy. If happy is too big a word – I can completely understand that mentality, I was almost afraid to be happy, I didn’t think I deserve it – try joy. If you are afraid to laugh, try smile.

To live passionately, is to stop being afraid.

If you knew today was your last, what would you do? I talked about this a few years ago on the subject of reducing trails of regrets and guilt, so that any day is a good day to die. (We all die, death should never be in the taboo list; by acknowledging this fact is the first step to liberate yourself from fear and live passionately)

Conor Kerr, did just that, and left a legacy after him. He was and still is an inspiration, and a constant reminder that we too, can continue to love life even when it’s ending.

When a relationship ended, when a marriage ended, when love and sacred vows were broken, I thought it was the end of life. In hindsight, you can say I blew things out of proportion; it felt justified then.

The truth? The only things that end life are death and paralysis, because it would be cruel for me to sing the possibilities of passionate living when one has lost complete control of the body. Again, please spare me the saying of the human body is just a temporary residence to the soul, I believe in the soul, but I support Euthanasia aka mercy killing too, so you understand now where my stand is on this subject. (It’s just a personal opinion and preference, there is no need to debate and get all fed up with it. I am tired of angry and defensive people.)

Passion is always associated with Love. That’s probably right. Do something you love, be with someone you love. Love something, love someone.

Love, has vaster than ocean definitions for different people.

Romantically, one of the early signs of a budding love begins with the immense joy deriving from the communication between the two persons. Remember when you never thought anyone could talk about the out-of-your-world mathematics formula more interestingly than this special someone? (You probably didn’t understand the square, cube, minus and plus in the string of formula, and it didn’t matter.)

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Love is when the special someone told you that he loved your voice and felt happy just to listen to you. For some of you, you are married to this person who said those words to you, and years gone by, he/she still loves to hear you talk. When all the busy phases in life die down, there is just you and that someone, having all the time in the world to still continue the never-ending conversation.

In the end, we only want someone who is willing to listen.

I look at some older couples and I often wonder if they didn’t like each other from the beginning. When did they stop enjoying conversing with each other? Did they know they will end up here today, wishing that the other person will just shut up. Since when, they stop caring? Rather, since when did they start ignoring happiness?

This is my precious gift, I read too much into things, I study too intensively into patterns. Knowing what they didn’t know before, gives me an edge to overcome and avoid the common vicious cycle.

Like love, resentment sparks off the first sign in any relationship. If not dealt with, it will almost definitely land you at where your grouchy parents are.

I don’t about you, but I can never grow old with anyone who doesn’t want to hear me talk anymore.

Sometimes I hear old couples complained about each other. I can’t help but wondered why they choose to stay in a rotting/rotten relationship? I am bold, I ask when I don’t understand (shouldn’t that be the default action? Ask when you don’t know?). Almost all the resentful partners said, ‘I don’t know, it’s been so long, you know.’. I understand, it is hard to break a pattern/habit, especially that a joint world has been built around the partners now – the kids, the house, the bed, the routine, this and that.

I, will not trade my idea (realistic or not) of a fulfilling relationship for comfort – reluctance to break a comfortable pattern, or the fear to relearn independence.

Again, good thing that I am weird and odd. There aren’t too many people like me, I think. Or, no one will ever get married or stay married!

Whether being single or married, we should always maintain some kind of independence. It is not just so that we prepare ourselves for the worst (don’t start something if you don’t think it will bode well for the future; do something when it stops working), but we could continue to enjoy a life that is capable of reaching its full potential. With or without a partner, we can be just as happy – I know I can.

Maintaining an amicable marriage is not my motto, unfortunately. It is a pathetic way to comfort ourselves that if we are not ‘lucky’ enough to have a loving marriage, at least we have an amicable one. Cracking the sugar-coating open, it really means it’s probably best to maintain minimal interaction to avoid conflict, thus the amicable status. This is when I apply that statement again, ‘I don’t about you, I can never grow old with anyone who doesn’t want to hear me talk anymore.’.

Now, I have to go live passionately with my one life. 😉

 

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