I am working on a new design – see the sketch – and one thing led to another (as always!), I see a relationship between time and food, more accurately, the duration of our life span and concept of food. Abundance vs. Scarcity When we were young, we made (probably still making) the same mistake in assuming that we still…
Once in a while, logic is put at the back burner, and emotions take over resulting in the overwhelmingly deep sense of loneliness deriving from a collision of rational reasoning and engulfing emotions. An overdrive of emotions yet leaving a sense of emptiness.
The dichotomy of emotions and rationality works like a switch, and there is also an emergency trip switch. Overwhelming and confusing emotions set off anxiety, and anxiety trips the emergency switch to high rational mode. In order to maintain functionality, we talk facts and logic, which can be unacceptable. Imagine this, when someone in your life dies, the only thing you could do was to talk about normality of life cycle – birth and death. It’s a way to explain the particular event – death – to make sense of what is happening; but it would be considered as highly insensitive and inappropriate. Our difference in coping methods divides us in times like this. There should be no right or wrong way to cope, yet our response would be considered offending.
Often times, we thought of broken heart as one of the most inconsolable pains in human experiences. I won’t refute that. I realised that it is not the moment when your heart was broken that is most painful; it is the picking up the pieces that hurts most.
Pain has a way to distort our rational thoughts. Shall I say, cognitive dissonance? What we know is that the relationship was once good. We felt happy. The same thoughts that once put a smile to our face, now flow the stream of tears down our cheeks. We are suddenly convinced that those are bad thoughts, and we adjust our behaviours to align with the new feelings.
Sometimes, we confuse missing someone with hating someone. It is okay to miss someone that we may never have in our life anymore. Let the truth be truth because it is sad to have to lie to ourselves.
I live in a bubble world of my own. I crave to connect with world out there; I desire for a soulmate who is the same and we will blow a bigger bubble to encompass our individual bubbles. When the bigger bubble is safe enough, we burst our bubbles to be one. Poetic, isn’t it? Therapy Like my autism, seeking…
Time concept changes for the person in the meltdown, and the person waiting. This post illustrates the differences and the possible outcomes. Some outcomes are undesired, and permanent. Meltdown is detrimental to any kind of relationship.
We must not confuse understanding the essence of the meltdown with the instinctive reactions to it. By illuminating the adverse effects of meltdowns, I hope to raise awareness in preventing meltdown than to manage it. Every meltdown can be potentially the last one because practise doesn’t make perfect.
Human Nature – Learned and Automated Responses
Let’s dabble in the subject on Human Nature a little bit. By the time you finished reading the story, you may be formulating your own judgement and conclusion, yes?
See, that is human nature. We think that this story is about a problem needed to be fixed, but this is really just a story needs to be examined and understood.
Human nature, sometimes generally grouped as primal instinct, is based largely on precedent assumptions – learned behaviours. A grossly overrated excuse for poor behaviours or reluctance in personal growth.
We are attracted to the opinionated other until we are in love and a different opinion suddenly becomes an opposing tool because it’s unbearable to think he/she thinks otherwise. When we accept that the change in chemistry is actually a good thing, and acknowledge that such change is only because two people care so much about each other; we will not see difference as difference, but as interestingness; like it has always been. Un-break the broken nature, embrace the wisdom of broadening the perception, and looking at the larger picture, then, love abounds!